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Some Mornings

General Poetry - post, comment, review, critique
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indar
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Joined: Sun Jan 07, 2018 8:00 am

Some Mornings

Post by indar » Tue Jul 04, 2023 7:10 pm

Some Mornings

the marine layer burns away early.
I can see Mystic Hill from here,
the light on its face--
not a hill really, tightly packed
stacks of lava that stuck
in the throat of a volcano
so long ago considered extinct.
Who's to say? Some days
the silence is palpable.

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Gyppo
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Location: UK

Re: Some Mornings

Post by Gyppo » Wed Jul 05, 2023 2:10 am

I love this description, can sense the brooding potential in the supposedly extinct volcano.

Quote:   Some days
the silence is palpable.

Like the silence which can suddenly descend in a previously noisy pub when someone asks, very quietly, very calmly, "Would you care to repeat that?"

Nice one, Indar.

Gyppo
I've been writing ever since I realised I could.  Storytelling since I started talking.  Poetry however comes and goes  ;-)

indar
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Re: Some Mornings

Post by indar » Wed Jul 05, 2023 10:57 am

Many decades later, I still remember a fine example of what you speak of. Speech teacher, high school (in the 50s) demonstrated two ways of expressing oneself. The first was a rather hysterical, repeated yell: get out get out get out accompanied by arm waving. The second was low and intense "GET   OUT"  and left no doubt as to whether one should leave immediately, no further discussion.

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Mark
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Re: Some Mornings

Post by Mark » Wed Jul 05, 2023 11:30 am

indar wrote:
Tue Jul 04, 2023 7:10 pm

stacks of lava that stuck
in the throat of a volcano

 
Like that. Great image. Tuff  little poem all round.
 

indar
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Re: Some Mornings

Post by indar » Fri Aug 04, 2023 4:35 pm

Tuff  little poem

I feel very complimented! Thanks Mark.

Dave
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Re: Some Mornings

Post by Dave » Fri Aug 11, 2023 10:06 am

Those last two lines are wonderful and devasting too. The silence they produce is brilliantly done.

indar
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Re: Some Mornings

Post by indar » Sat Aug 12, 2023 4:46 pm

Thanks Dave, natural events seem to be happening in unnatural ways more and more. Why not the reawakening of a volcano? 

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Tracy Mitchell
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Re: Some Mornings

Post by Tracy Mitchell » Tue Oct 24, 2023 10:46 am

Love the construction of this-- a terse musing with bluntly effective opening and closing lines.  Solid, solid bookends 8-)

"Extinct" . . . or dormant?  Just asking.  

"Palpable" is such a subtly powerful word. But it takes a special context for its use---like here.

Bravo.

T

 

skylightgreg
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Re: Some Mornings

Post by skylightgreg » Tue Nov 07, 2023 10:03 am

love it.  resonating on many levels.

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