The Tangled Branch Discussion Forums

Love it indar, I can so relate! Am in a hurry, I will return to give better consideration here, just wanted to pop in and say I enjoyed

Tremblingly poignant but understated writing, Linda. The wealth of detail makes it easy to invest in this poem. My only nit is to look at the syntax of the last line in S4.

I like this one very much. Love the progression. It works very well. I too stumble a bit at S4. Maybe removing,

as someone should have done with me.

Lovely relatable poem.

Impressive how you weave the theme through so much detail, so much of life. 
The bus stop confession gives great insight into the N's feelings.  
All of the pets form a pattern in N's remembrance.

 

There is such a familiar mother-specific fear, guilt and worry woven throughout this. It's so softly and skillfully done that it isn't obtrusive. The title is heavy with importance; without it the piece loses a large part of its weight. Wonderfully wrought, great poeming.

Best,
Sharon

Thanks Sharon,

I have delayed answering comments on my oh-too-numerous posts hoping some will sink from sight, fall over the edge, sail into the sunset. If I have not thanked you for comments on some of those others I thank you here

I made the same apology to Tracy elsewhere. 

Mother-guilt. Does it help to write about it?

 

hi Indar

I played around with some options, but found I have no suggestions. The poem connects with its weight of self-judgement. The affection given at the end unburdens to some degree.

enjoyed

Phil

Thanks Phil,

I have a question posted on BWF about ending with a preposition and how contorted some sentences get in service to correctness. I have written this piece in as simple a voice as I can get away with (ahem). Did you search for other options because of the repetition, the simplistic voice or incorrect grammar? 

Appreciate the read and comment

Oh as long as this poem is back in first position, thank you Mark, Marc and Tracy for the read and comment