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Stricken
Posted: Sat Jan 20, 2018 7:18 am
by Marc Gilbert
It strikes me that I’m stricken
and stricken I will fall
but falling is a fate
that will surely strike us all.
(I thought we need a 4 liner 
)
Re: Stricken
Posted: Sat Jan 20, 2018 7:22 am
by Sharon Leigh
Hee!
We did need a 4 liner come to think of it!
Re: Stricken
Posted: Sun Jan 21, 2018 6:40 am
by Mark
Nice CPian quattro!
Re: Stricken
Posted: Sun Jan 21, 2018 8:19 am
by Tracy Mitchell
Clever lines.
Can the first line absorb another syllable?
It reads easier for me as :
It strikes me that I'm stricken
or
It strikes that I am stricken
But perhaps you don't want the iambs.
just asking.
Cheers.
T
Re: Stricken
Posted: Sun Jan 21, 2018 8:38 am
by Marc Gilbert
Tracy Mitchell wrote: ↑Sun Jan 21, 2018 8:19 am
Clever lines.
Can the first line absorb another syllable?
It reads easier for me as :
It strikes me that I'm stricken
or
It strikes that I am stricken
But perhaps you don't want the iambs.
just asking.
Cheers.
T
I thought the "me" was there.
Thanks for the spot!
Re: Stricken
Posted: Sun Jan 21, 2018 8:41 am
by Tracy Mitchell
Sometimes me is there, sometimes not.