The Tangled Branch Discussion Forums

.
At best
Goodness will not prevail.
and goodwill not return.
This may be a dogleg
on the  path to evil.

Flags
We need a baby nuke or two
for the next big-big steps
and if Mad Vlad won’t,
DIY will have to do.

Points
There will be no pitchfork revolutions
with facial scans and carbon merits
social credits and loyalty plans,
only betrayal of neighbours. 

Archaeologists
Found 10 000 skeletons
left in bins from 2022.
5000 were female
and 5000 male.
 
 

Good to have you posting again. Having said that these neat - too neat - works leave me hungry for soemthing more substantial perhaps and less clever. The first poem is betrayed by the weak inclusion of 'may', which robs the statement of conviction IMO. The first two lines are much more robust in their confidence. I,however, don't believe the sentiment and reject the pseudo meaningfulness of the word 'evil'.

Poem two has a clear enough premise, easy enough to make, but lacks a necessary grounding, surely. This is were poetry often lacks what analysis might provide. I think it might also benefit from a different metre. The first line is strongest for having a iambic rhythm, perhaps.

Three is the strongest poem of the four.
The last poem is the slyest.

Dave

Hi Dave

Thanks for commenting. Wasn't really expecting any feedback... I haven't commented of late.... but I have quietly shifted a ton of crappy spam in recent weeks.
You are right, of course, the (shrinking) 4-line format doesn't offer much depth to address complex issues and it shows...but that is anyway the challenge.

Very strange days indeed, it does feel like this is a War on Humanity but everyone's too busy to take much notice or have much to say. Instead we constantly adapt to the "new abnormal" and rest our hopes on the face-switching of political puppets.
I can't see any of this ending well, I'm afraid.