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Cats.

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Gyppo
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Joined: Sat Mar 31, 2018 3:28 pm
Location: UK

Cats.

Post by Gyppo » Mon Jan 11, 2021 2:32 pm

Cats

We'll never really be friends,
we have too much in common.
Both comfortable in our own skins.

But we acknowledge each other,
as free spirits.  Each true to himself,
to his inner nature.

You never beg food at my door, 
and no longer casually stroll in.
We both respect unspoken boundaries.

Some cats look guilty in the early hours,
returning from a night's hunting
to lounge around as adored pets. 

We just nod at each other in passing,
each sensing the fellow creature 
who 'walks on his wild lone'.

Gyppo
 
I've been writing ever since I realised I could.  Storytelling since I started talking.  Poetry however comes and goes  ;-)

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Colm Roe
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Re: Cats.

Post by Colm Roe » Mon Jan 11, 2021 6:54 pm

Really enjoyed this Gyppo. 
A nice take on the unique relationship we have with our cats, and just as importantly, the ones they have with us  :)
Absolutely love the 'we just nod at each other' line. That really says it all.

 

Eladbernard
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Joined: Thu Mar 01, 2018 4:46 am

Re: Cats.

Post by Eladbernard » Tue Jan 12, 2021 2:04 am

I think you really capture and personalized the attitude that cats can have. That view is commonplace, but you show it in a simple and fresh way, that underlines a deeper meaning. On the face of it, you and the cat very different, however, you both understand the "unspoken boundaries" between yourselves. You have the same values and respect the others space, it's a wonderful example of the complex relationships between animals and humans.
A really nice read. 

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Tracy Mitchell
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Re: Cats.

Post by Tracy Mitchell » Tue Jan 12, 2021 7:47 am

You nailed it, Gypp.

I read that cats are not domesticated in the same sense as other animals. Rather, they just came to live near, and then with, people. Their lives were made easy by the mice and other little creatures living off the bread and meat scraps around humans. So they made themselves at home -- for 20,000 years. We have no compact with cats like we have with other domesticated animals.

The closest we come is, like you descibe: "We just nod at each other in passing. . .". Of course there is the lapwarmer thing, but that is piecemeal.

Anyway, I suggest you consider ending the poem with the above line.

T

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Gyppo
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Location: UK

Re: Cats.

Post by Gyppo » Sat Jan 16, 2021 1:54 pm

Cheers, Folks.

Suggestions have been taken on board.  This is one of those things I will probably juggle around a bit more over the next few weeks  There's already a few squiggles on my scratch pad ;-)  If I make a noticeable revision I'll post it here when it happens.

I'm know I'm guilty of not wanting to 'murder my darlings' in that the borrowed phrase from Kipling about 'walking on his wild lone' has to stay in there somewhere.  That one image was the trigger for the whole thing.

=====

That hoary old classic bit of advice to 'murder your darlings' to improve your work has some validity in factual magazine articles, where it can prevent you inflicting an idle flight of whimsy or an over-abundance of barely relevant but personally fascinating research material on the reader.

But in poetry and fiction it needs to be treated with caution.  In the more creative writings we are trying to elicit a response, or trigger an emotion in the reader, not just give them a straight fact which they can either accept or leave.  Possibly with no great passion either way.

Sometimes the response, meaning, or emotion a reader finds in a poem is totally different from what you intended.  But once you've seen it through their eyes you will probably admit, sometimes grudgingly, and sometimes as an 'Ahah!' moment that their 'take' is at least valid.  Sometimes so much so it can trigger a different variant on the original theme.

Gyppo 
 
I've been writing ever since I realised I could.  Storytelling since I started talking.  Poetry however comes and goes  ;-)

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Tracy Mitchell
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Re: Cats.

Post by Tracy Mitchell » Sat Jan 16, 2021 2:12 pm

:) I hear you.

Sometimes the nail does need to be removed from nail soup, or the stone from stone soup, but that is your call. Still love the poem.

T

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Qwerty
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Location: Southern California

Re: Cats.

Post by Qwerty » Fri Jan 29, 2021 12:28 pm

Your poem went right to the heart of my thoughts and feelings about cats and my experience with them. I grew up with dogs and cats but spent more time with the dogs than with the cats. My favorite canine friends were those who went on runs with me in the woods. Later in life, after having to say goodbye to what would turn to be my last dog, I was left with five cats. Wow, did they change my attitude about cats! After I've had a chance to give feedback to a few more poets here at Tangled, I'll post a few of my cat-centered poems. Thanks Gyppo--great poem!
Words go together in zillions of ways. Some ways go shallow and some ways go deep. ~ James Dickey

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