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Dark Matter

General Poetry - post, comment, review, critique
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Colm Roe
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Dark Matter

Post by Colm Roe » Wed Jan 08, 2020 3:04 am

Osmosis sucks what's left of him
towards the ether,
removing mass, volume, dignity
and steals attempted words.

I know confusion stops him,
imagine truths
unspoken words hard working men
wanted to, but weren't allowed to speak.

Is he being absorbed
or maybe imploding?

Each silent visit
heavier than the last,
adding critical mass.

Warming a core,
that gravity
concentrates.

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Deb
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Location: Southern California USA
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Re: Dark Matter

Post by Deb » Wed Jan 08, 2020 3:21 am

Colm, your poems ring deeply personal. I gather your father is languishing in the last months or weeks of his life?
I found this one profound in getting to the core of what's happening in your mind as you see it and in empathizing with this person.

A stark, moving piece.


All the best to you and yours in the coming weeks.

Hugs,
Deb

ajduclos
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Joined: Mon Apr 01, 2019 7:35 pm

Re: Dark Matter

Post by ajduclos » Wed Jan 08, 2020 2:21 pm

Wonderful, painful, bleak writing.  If N in this and in "Waiting" is you, I send solace and peace - and I wish your father safe journey.

I have no words....

Aj

 

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Tracy Mitchell
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Re: Dark Matter

Post by Tracy Mitchell » Fri Jan 10, 2020 7:10 pm

Hi Colm,
Another sobering take on the subject of death and dying.  Very thought-provoking, you are making me reflective about my own 'future'.  Thanks for that.

S.2 loses me in the grammar.  I don't know what it is doing.
S.3 I am not convinced the stanza advances the poem.

The closing is excellent.

I also like your new avatar.  Is that some iteration of Colm?

Cheers.

T

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Colm Roe
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Re: Dark Matter

Post by Colm Roe » Fri Jan 10, 2020 8:03 pm

Thanks for your comments aj and Tracy.
Not an iteration Tracy, just a sketch I did of Ronnie Wood :)

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Tracy Mitchell
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Re: Dark Matter

Post by Tracy Mitchell » Fri Jan 10, 2020 8:31 pm

very nice sketch -- you have multiple talents.

T

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Colm Roe
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Re: Dark Matter

Post by Colm Roe » Sat Jan 11, 2020 2:29 am

one or two :)

ajduclos
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Re: Dark Matter

Post by ajduclos » Sat Jan 11, 2020 4:00 am

Yes - Ronnie Wood !!!!!!  The Rolling Stones among others.  Really nice sketched likeness.  Many talents, Colm.........

Aj

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