Down the San Miguel River

[Tracy Mitchell]

Hi Dave,
Thanks for the close read.  Yes, S.2 virtually drips with "s" sounds. I wasn't completely aware how gross that is-- like excessive syrup.    I will try to damper the sounds back.   

I always appreciate your comments. 

Cheers.

T

[Deb]

Tracy, I love the vivid imagery here as you weave it into the lore of the land. I see the light glint from the waters, can smell the fresh air, and hear the waters rushing.

I'll return to this to read again.

~Deb

[Tracy Mitchell]

Thanks Deb for the kind comments.  Good to see you here. 

T

[Wren Tuatha]

Hi Tracy
I am taken more by the sounds within the piece. The first stanza is dominated by f sounds and the second by all the s endings in the plurals. The plurals reinforce nicely the theme of origin and succession in the piece. Nevertheless, I felt the f sounds work better and the S sounds ome closing to overload. The last stanza foregoes such repetition of sound, which suits the theme but does contain two pieces of Alliteration that reinforce the ideas they carry. On the whole this is for me quite a typical piece for you combining observation of a real experience of a landscape and a deeper sense of spiritualism and history.
Very well written.

Vowel sounds, too.