The Tangled Branch Discussion Forums

Love it, T. Clever with the bite of truth to it also. It's enough to drive someone like myself nutty (I second-guess everything!) Great poeming, enjoyed this

John, this poem really hit me in the feels. I just... it really did. What poignant, powerful writing. What wrenching sorrow for a parent to endure. This is quietly elegant and beautiful, and thank you for sharing it with us.

Wow...powerful writing. Really distills what it is to wait bedside at times like these, without frill or fluff. I did notice the close/frequent use of 'doors' but actually like it, quite appropriate. Wishing you and yours well during this difficult time. 

lovely, sad, and well written, especially that third stanza!

How very beautiful, Tracy. So much contained within. I like Colm's suggestion "that catch" in the final stanza, since the assonance is gently pretty imo and it still keeps to your syllable count. What lovely poeming, a delight. 

A quiet contemplation, beautiful in its calm acceptance. There is no raging against here, but a resigned nod. Love the poem as is, Colm. 

Tracy, Tim, all my thanks, really. It means a lot. 

 

I am so sorry, for your loss - It's difficult to find words... all my condolences at this most trying time, indar

Aj, thank you for saying so 😊 Colm, again my thanks, and I'm so glad the ending works! I do appreciate your feedback, it truly helps. Dave, thanks a million for your kind words here for the poem, reader experience is so valuable to me... So glad it isn't boring, I'd feared it might be! 😁 Hi Phil, al...

Thanks Colm, Gyppo... Gyp, yes it's a genuine memory. I wrote this in the reliving, so it's voiced broad and over-sweet as a 15 year old girl might. I neither did it justice nor dissected, just let it come as it may. I could examine it as 50-something Sharon and really condense/refine it, sharpen im...