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by ajduclos
Wed Feb 12, 2020 3:01 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Two poems: Blackthorn, and The Drummer
Replies: 8
Views: 171

Re: Two poems: Blackthorn, and The Drummer

Nice and full, these two poems.  Images are strong and clear.

I see some form and rhythm in these, Gyppo  ;)

Aj
by ajduclos
Wed Feb 12, 2020 2:55 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: No Tears
Replies: 10
Views: 147

Re: No Tears

Linda  - how elegantly simple yet loaded.  Very nice.
Aj   
by ajduclos
Wed Feb 12, 2020 2:37 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Steps
Replies: 22
Views: 255

Re: Steps

Thanks very much to you all, Colm, Tim, Gyppo and yes, you too, Tracy. ;)  I appreciate you all taking the time.  Very informative, perceptive and thought provoking. Trying to say too much is something I do almost consistently.  I wanted to write of the freak horror of his passing, her sudden loss, ...
by ajduclos
Mon Feb 10, 2020 1:43 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Steps
Replies: 22
Views: 255

Re: Steps

Gawd, Colm... that is sweet, full of emotion.  Such a gift to write free form and free flow... even about death !!!  I'm stuck in form and rhythm and there it is.

Thanks.

Aj 
by ajduclos
Mon Feb 10, 2020 1:39 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Between Here and There
Replies: 5
Views: 159

Re: Between Here and There

The poem may not fit a correct poetic approach... but it is beautifully written and expressive.  The last stanza spears the heart.

Aj
by ajduclos
Mon Feb 10, 2020 1:23 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Where Music Turns Sour
Replies: 4
Views: 74

Re: Where Music Turns Sour

So impressed what you and others can do with free form free thought poetry. 

"better days" indeed !!!!

Aj 

 
by ajduclos
Sat Feb 08, 2020 4:05 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Steps
Replies: 22
Views: 255

Re: Steps

Colm - I've been mulling over your comments and thinking about what I wrote and what it is and what I wanted to say.  It is indeed "telling" because it is a narrative poem.  And even though I was writing about Ruthie and her empty anguish, the poem is a universal metaphor for any and all sudden leav...
by ajduclos
Sat Feb 08, 2020 1:30 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Steps
Replies: 22
Views: 255

Re: Steps

Hey Colm -  Thanks for the comments and critique, for taking the time.  You do correctly see the distinction of S1, 2 and 3 from the rest of the poem.  And I was quite proud of some of these generics  :? The seed of this poem was seeing my dear neighbor in the very early grey overcast morning walkin...
by ajduclos
Sat Feb 08, 2020 1:34 am
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: Steps
Replies: 22
Views: 255

Steps

Mourning   - or -   Steps    Her feet follow paths they once trod, each step a struggle through grey dawn. Bleak morning greets raw mourning.   In a flash he was gone, flown on, vanished from earth's plane. Ground from sky pirouette blown down – no good-bye.   Ill winds whipped him headlong away no...
by ajduclos
Sun Jan 26, 2020 1:39 pm
Forum: Post Your Poems
Topic: When the last ship sails
Replies: 15
Views: 443

Re: When the last ship sails

Colm - I have no words................. Thanks for sharing.

Aj